I should be taking advantage of the fact I have one less kid today, and cleaning my house, but I realized I haven't blogged in over a month. I started having the kids update their blogs for their writing assignments on Friday, and so I would feel like a bit of a hypocrite if I didn't take some time to get something down too.
Allen is involved with the 11 year old scouts in our ward, and he had the opportunity to go camping with the big boys this weekend . . . in the mountains, in the snow. All the boys 11 to 18 in our area were able to go. I had no idea that it was that big before he went.
Allen was so excited. He packed 2 days in advance. He had such a tough time concentrating in school because he was so excited. Hubby was asked to come up as one of the chaperons. As they were getting into the car to leave, we saw that Allen had packed his stuffed woolly mammoth named Cludge. He sleeps with it every night. On his first camp out, he forgot Cludge, and he was not able to sleep well. I let Allen take him for the next several camp outs. When hubby saw that Allen had packed a stuffed animal to sleep with, he let him know that he could not bring Cludge. We had a little meltdown, and Allen cried all the way over to the drop off point. (Allen also decided to wear his footie pajamas that glow in the dark. Hubby wasn't delighted, but he allowed it.)
I told Allen that we have to learn to do things differently our whole lives. Allen turns 12 in a couple of months, and hubby and I have decided to let him start staying up later. I was talking to my mom, and I told her that I feel very much like I did when Allen gave up his naps. I was used to having a couple of hours to myself every day. I had a tough time adjusting to having two less hours of kid free time, but after a while, it wasn't such a big deal. I really enjoy my time at the end of the day when I don't have to be mom for a while, and this change will pretty much eliminate that time. I know that it will be an adjustment, but I know that eventually I can make the best of it. I guess you never stop growing up and adapting.
I hate being the bad guy. It broke my heart seeing Allen melt down like that. I hate it when I have to be strong and I have to be the mean guy when all I want to do is hug my kids and give them all the love I have to give them. I know that if I give them everything they ever ask for and everything to make their lives easier, they will never grow. I hate seeing my kids struggle, but I love seeing them succeed. I love seeing the confidence on their face when they accomplish something they didn't think they could do. Being a mom is really tough, and really awesome!!!
